Maintaining a positive perspective in hard life seasons is challenging. It’s easy to drift into a woe-is-me mindset and forget the way you feel now won’t last forever. One of my most difficult challenges in this season of grief is dreaming about Jim and then waking to find him not here. Sometimes, I don’t even […]
Grief, the Thief
In these months since Jim’s death, I’ve come to view grief as a thief. I know grief is a necessary part of moving beyond loss, but without placing boundaries on grief, it runs rampant, unbridled and all-consuming. Following are reflections on the thievery of grief: Regret Everyone has regrets in grief. Less than an hour […]
And Guess What
Fillers. All of us use them when speaking. Yours might be “um,” “you know,” or “right.” My four-year-old grandson’s conversation filler is “And guess what.” Although he invites you to guess, he leaves no room for you to speak, plowing forward with his next thought— “And guess what, I have a loose tooth. And guess […]
The Gift of Laughter in Grief
If you are staid, formal, and have rigid ideas about what is acceptable behavior for the grieving, you should stop reading now, because this post is about the blessing, value, and power of humor in grief. Since Jim’s death, our family has shed tears, but we have also laughed—a lot. Jim’s celebration of life included […]
Comfort and Joy
“Comfort” and “Joy,” words we often associate with Christmas. But can comfort and joy coexist with loss and grief? Yes, both comfort and joy are sustaining me in this season of my life. Following are among my sources of comfort and joy: Grandchildren My precious grandchildren provide so much comfort and joy during these days […]
9 Foundational Building Blocks for 2024
My father was a builder, so I grew up around construction sites, tools, and lumber. I learned a lot from my father, not only about building, but also about life. My father’s life mirrored his values and his actions modeled his beliefs. Key elements for constructing a sound structure are a sturdy, level, and plumb […]
The Gift of Music
Last weekend, I sang in our choir Christmas presentation. Unless you are a singer, I’m not sure you can fully understand the joy it brings to stand side-by-side with others who are singing. A camaraderie exists in blending voices and finally “getting” difficult passages. While the audience hears seemingly effortless, beautiful music, only vocalists know […]
Experiencing and Managing Emotions
God created us with the ability to experience emotions. But if you’ve ever lashed out in anger or been the victim of someone’s anger, you know unbridled emotions are powerful and can be destructive. Thankfully, we don’t have to be a slave to our emotions. How we act and react, and whether we allow our […]
Moving Ahead
Within the next few weeks, a significant life chapter closes for me. Many of you have followed my chronicles of cleaning out the house my father built in 1966 for my grandparents and aunts and preparing it for sale. Last week, the house went on the market. Less than 24 hours later, it was under […]
The Brevity of Life
Some weeks, as I sit at the computer to write a post for my blog, the concept comes together quickly, and words flow through my fingers. Other times, I watch a flashing cursor and white screen until an idea finally gels. This week was different. I started a post, had a full outline, knew where […]