Light in the Darkness

When I was a child, Halloween meant dressing in a costume Mama made for me. I went with her to the cloth store to select the cloth and pattern. One year, she made a colonial dress; another year, a cat costume. I also remember wearing a powder-blue princess dress, crown, and pretty-face plastic mask, that […]

Continue Reading

A Season of Hard Stuff

Are you in a life season when everything feels more complicated than usual? I’m there. Supposedly, the pace of life slows in retirement years. I haven’t found it to be so. Here are reflections on a season of dealing with hard stuff: Complicated Business Processes After 50+ years, a landholding corporation my father and uncle […]

Continue Reading

The Complicated Nature of Grief

I am nearing the year and a half mark of widowhood. You’d think I’d have this grief thing figured out by now, but frequently, I get a jarring reminder that I’m still a toddler in this journey of loss. Nebulous Sadness One day last week, I texted my daughter and said, “I’m weepy today, for […]

Continue Reading

Beyond a Year of Firsts

Friday of this week marks the one-year anniversary of the day I found Jim’s lifeless body at the top of the back stairs. It’s not really the kind of anniversary you want to acknowledge, yet there it is on the calendar, the “3” pulsing with emotion and memories. For many months after Jim’s death, I […]

Continue Reading

The Music of Heaven on Earth

Sunday, I had the joy of singing in our choir Christmas presentation. This year was different. Jim wasn’t sitting in the men’s section. Unlike last year, when Jim remembered his music was still at home halfway there, I got to the church on time. After the presentation, I hugged my family, who were in attendance, […]

Continue Reading

Running on Empty

Several weeks ago, our pastor began his sermon with a story about pushing the limits on his gas gauge. He went on to equate the story with times we push ourselves too far and end up running on empty. I’m there…running on empty. The first half of this year has been non-stop, with very few […]

Continue Reading

Life on the Other Side

When thrust into unexpected change, you take slow steps, halting forward motion, as you experience life on the other side. Life changes on the other side of a loved one’s death, presenting you with challenges and lots of firsts as you navigate uncharted waters. First holidays, first solo events, and first experiences, are all tinged […]

Continue Reading

The Healing Power of Nature

Spring came early this year, and I am glad. I needed the return of color to brighten the solemnness of loss. Following are observations on the healing power of nature: Light One of the joys of spring is the change in light and the return of warmth. Although there are days when winter’s chill lingers, […]

Continue Reading