Do you know people who are fixers? If you mention the slightest something that is out of whack, they immediately begin searching online for a quick fix or make suggestions of things to try. Sometimes, you’re not requesting a fix, but rather simply venting concern or frustration. Yet, fixers jump in without knowing all the details and make it their mission to fix what they perceive needs repair.
But not everything in life is fixable. So much is out of our control. Some things resolve with time. Others aren’t within the realm of adjustment.
So how do you handle it when you can’t fix it?
Control
Often, fixers are those who seek to control elements of their world to avoid the unknown. The fear factor is strong for controllers/fixers. Their mantra is “if I don’t fix this, something awful will happen.” Some things we can control; others we can’t. Knowing the difference prevents spinning wheels on pointless effort.
Patience
Most of us struggle with patience. We live in a hurry up, right now world that trains us to expect instant everything. Patience is a discipline that must be cultivated. Each time you resist the urge to forge ahead because impatience is driving you, you gain a star on your personal patience chart.
Waiting allows time for God to speak, teach, and act. Ponder what God is saying and teaching you in and through this situation. His field of vision is far greater than ours. Allow patience to hold you in check while you wait for God to act.
Workaround
At times, a workaround appears for what seems to be an impossible situation. Suddenly, you gain a perspective that wasn’t there before. That idea may help the situation. But resist the temptation to rush ahead of God in order to accomplish a quick fix.
Acceptance
Occasionally, we encounter life situations that can’t be fixed or changed. A sudden death. A terminal diagnosis. A major change in life. This is when you pivot to acceptance and wisdom for next steps.
Stand Still
Stillness and patience are Siamese twins when it comes to life situations that you feel call for fixing. Panic changes nothing; it just magnifies the circumstances, blowing them out of proportion. Often, what we waste time and energy on resolves without our intervention.
When the Children of Israel were sandwiched between the Red Sea and an oncoming army of Egyptians, fear and panic took over. Moses instructed them to be still and watch what the Lord would do. Their lives depended on trust and inaction, which seemed counterintuitive for their situation. Yet, through obedience and trust, they saw a miracle occur. Their pursuers perished and were never seen again.
Perhaps the same is true of your seemingly unfixable life situations. Resolution happens through no effort of our own.
Trust is a key component in learning to stand still and see what God does. Standing still doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve lost headway; it means forward motion is in God’s hands, His will, and His timing. Trust Him.
“Moses told the people, Fear not; stand still (firm, confident, undismayed) and see the salvation of the Lord which He will work for you today. For the Egyptians you have seen today you shall never see again” (Exodus 14:13 AMPC).
©CandyArrington
Candy Arrington is an award-winning writer, blogger, and speaker. She often writes on tough topics with a focus on moving through, and beyond, difficult life circumstances. Candy has written hundreds of articles, stories, and devotions published by numerous outlets including: Inspiration.org, Arisedaily.com, CBN.com, Healthgrades.com, Care.com, Focus on the Family, NextAvenue.org, CountryLiving.com, and Writer’s Digest. Candy’s books include Life on Pause: Learning to Wait Well (Bold Vision Books), When Your Aging Parent Needs Care (Harvest House), and AFTERSHOCK: Help, Hope, and Healing in the Wake of Suicide (B&H Publishing Group).
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